Crossing that Line

Had a fun night  dinner  with  the cuzzos  and  guess  what  it says  in   my  fortune cookie ...

I  really  hope that  whatever  it  is  , it  will  make me smile  from  ear  to  ear  just  like  the smileys  on  this  fortune cookie  mini  scroll ..

Smile

The past  days,  I forgot  to  smile siguro dala ng daming problema na dinadala  ko  ngayon....parang hindi  na naubos kakabuhos  ni  LORD saken ng problems .

 Di  naman ako  nagrereklamo Lord pero  sunod sunod  lang kase  .

Yikes himala ata I'm blogging in  tagalog  which I  seldom  do.

Sa kakamukmuk  ko  lately naglabasan na lines malapit sa lipline ko and sa crow's feet.

Siguro  ganun talaga pag  may  mga problems ka hinaharap  you  tend to  forget to smile,   but  it's not a reason to  just mukmuk  and frown and naka kunot noo  ka  na lang palagi .

Sabi  nga nila there are no problems na hindi  mo kayang lusutan , but this one is I  can say super MABIGAT na I don't even know  where to  start and how to resolve it.

I  guess only time can tell ...

So  if you  do  see me around SMILING , I  may  look  happy  but  deep  inside I  got  a big problem  trying to  hide some pain I'm feeling inside .

Hays madrama na naman ... 'till then folks

What Keeps Me Going

Things are really   hard for  me right now,  but  I  know everything  will  be okay .

Stay Strong

Life is unfair that's a fact....

I  still  feel  numb from all the things I  had to  absorb the past few days ....

 It felt so  UNREAL to  me like a very  scary  movie or a freakin nightmare.

How I wish it is a nightmare, but it's not , this is something that  I have to deal  with  ... 

Crying is the only resort I can do right now , that  the puffiness of my  eyes can't be ignored anymore or even the  shades  of  a concealer can hide it ....

What  I  am going through  is like of that  story  out of a Spanish  daytime soap opera  , however, I have no clue if I  go  with the contrabidas or the  bidas of the story  , or I can be both ....

I  can scream and scream from the top of my  lungs all day  , just  to  release the  steam  I'm feeling inside.

Hyperventilation is one thing I  have to  fight to , so  I  wouldn't alarm everyone around me  that  causes any  more chaos in the house.

Got so  many  questions,  and I  know  that the right time to  get those answers ...

I tell  myself and breathe ... STAY STRONG

恭禧發財( Gong Hey Fat Choy) HAPPY NEW YEAR ^_^

It's that  time of the year again , and of course we didn't forget to  celebrate the start  of the Lunar Chinese New Year, although we don't celebrate this family tradition as we used too,  we still  pay respect to  those ancestors  who  had instilled upon us the value  of  having family  dinners or get togethers this  year and what is the true meaning of this celebration.

Chinese language was one of the languages  I wasn't able to  master ( I'm sure Apong would be so  disappointed ) , but I am contemplating in taking Chinese language again ( and hopefully this  time I'll be paying  more attention )... There are two  ways of saying it and these are:

 Gong Xi Fa Cai(Mandarin)

 and 

Gong Hey Fat Choy(Cantonese)

We got our Nian Gao  ( Sticky Rice in English &  Tikoy is the Filipino Tagalog term ) & some moon cakes yum yum . 

Of course mom gave me my own  HONG BAO ( those little red small envelopes with money that are given during this season to kids ) .... 

Yea I got mine and my bro got one too  , I  guess we are not  too old to be given these things 0_* . 

Me so LOVING it 

A Hot Morning

I  woke up  to the scorching heat, not that  our AC wasn't working but the stupid  weather was just a real pain  so  I decided  to  cool down and went to  the mall  ( yeah  literally went here and ( 9:45ish in the morning )  .

Although the  mall  don't open till  10am  the Starbucks inside already  is, so  i  paved  my  way  to it's location and sat  my  big booty  in the one corner   and ordered myself my breakfast  and cool down drink...


GREEN TEA FRAP  WITH WHIP CREAM ( I just  had to  get it with a whip cream i  couldn't resist )
 & Madeleine French Petites  ( they  remind me of BROAS but  soft and chewy )

my day in a Starbucks establishment is not  complete when  i don't eat this pastries ... no wonder I am gaining weight hahaha

My Life as a Hairdresser (sigh)

lil cuz Maybell has hair up to the waist and she really wanted to get a haircut but don't wanna spend money for a lil snip snip ...

 So I  gave her a haircut and now the verdict 


sorry guys my pictures were a little blurry.

BACK  PART

FINISH PRODUCT 

was happy to  see my cuzin's face that  she likes her new hair  and that 's the story of my day  as a Hairdresser .

Michiko Coconut Soup [ GINATAANG BILO-BILO]

It's getting colder and colder each day  as winter months arrived here in the east coast . 

I was craving for this semi sweet sticky  soup  that  is  common in Philippines as MERIENDA in the afternoon , so I decided to  cook  this  so called merienda which  Filipinos call GINATAANG BILO BILO  or we call here in the states as MICHIKO COCONUT SOUP 

INGREDIENTS FOR MAKING   BILO -BILO  

FOR MAKING THE GLUTINOUS BALLS

1 cup glutinous rice flour

1/2 cup water

1. Combine glutinous rice flour and water.

2. Mix the mixture thoroughly. A soft yet sticky mixture should be formed.

3. Scoop about 1 1/2 to 2 teaspoons of the mixture and roll it into a ball shaped figure using your hands. Tip: Try to wet your hands a little to prevent the mixture from sticking.

4. Place the mixture in a plate or any flat container and do the same steps until all the mixture is used up.

FOR  SWEET BASE SOUP  PART

1. In a large pot, bring coconut milk, sugar,  sweet potato, jack fruit and tapioca to a boil. When tapioca turns transparent in color, add the rice balls and saba banana.

2. Add remaining pure coconut milk when the rice balls are soft and firm. Boil for 5 more minutes.

4. Serve hot.

GLUTINOUS RICE POWDER

KNEADING THE GLUTINOUS RICE INTO A BIG BALL

KNEADED TO BE CUT INTO  SMALLER BALLS

THE MINI  BILO  BILOS 

MINI  TAPIOCA BALLS BEING BOILED

BOILED BANANA CUT  INTO  CUBES

LANGKA STRIPS

SWEET POTATO CUT INTO  CUBES

Mom and aunts were happy eating this special  Merienda I made for  the family this  weekend , who couldn't resist we miss this merienda dish  and literally  the last  time I ate one from Manila is way  back  in  1998. 

CUTESY BITSY LOVE

[ illustration created by  lova_03]

Just  browsing around and then i saw this lil cute picture, it reminded me of how great  it is  to  LOVE and BE LOVE by  someone ....

hah LOVE

the funny things about LOVE....

sheyt sana di na ako ma in love kase mahirap masaktan

nakakpagud umiyak

nakakapagud umunawa

lalu kung the other half DON'T EVEN GIVE A DAMN ABOUT HOW YOU FEEL

In You Version 1

this poem was originally written in  2008 when i was still SO IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE


just want to re post it for my  original poem compositions .

the  words  I  said,

 meant everything  to  me.

 the  dreams I  had ,

 I  wish  I  could  share it  with you  someday.

the hopes I  wanted,

 I  hoped you'll  appreciate .

 your laughter had always  brought  a smile to  my  face.

 your  thoughtful  words, encouraged me to  believe.

in  you  I  found my  happiness.

 in you  I  found the true meaning  of  Love.

in  you  I   found someone .

 whom  I  would want  to  share my  life with

a person  whom  I  would  love to  grow old  with

 all  in  all i found that  in YOU.

Happiness ..

   The past  few days, I noticed that  I've been smiling more frequently than what  I  usually  used  to  .
 I  mean yeah I usually have the smiley face that  people around me is used to .
 I can also  put  a MEAN BITCH FACE especially those days that  just  stresses me out...

the Pain Won't Go Away

 
[photo by  Piggygirlrocks of Devianart.com]

I  woke  up  this  morning with  the  feeling  of  emptiness inside me and
I  just sat in the little  corner of  my bed and started sobbing .
I  found myself just  walking toward the new football park  that  our  township had built .

It was quiet , it felt like I was in a another world just  so  peaceful...

With a lot  of  things had happened in my LIFE these past  months, it felt good to  be ALONE ....

Still trying to suck all what had happened with my "SO CALLED LOVE LIFE "

It was hard to comprehend ... as if I  was the one to blame on everything.

I wanted to  go home so  bad and patch things up, but this is so impossible to do.

How can I  make him stay and be strong for this relationship we had built together, when he decided  that it's all over.

those words he let go  stabbed me like a thousand times.....

I will  try  to  post more of  what  I'm feeling , but right now the emotions I  am feeling can't be describe by words .

It felt so  numb!







 

Old Wounds

[ photo by photoshopcreative.co.uk ]

From past  relationships  to the  next ,  we  sometimes  learn  from it  or  sometimes we DON'T we tend to  get BLIND  ,  from  the  promises to  the  false hopes .

Every  fall  we  learn to stand up on our  own  and  be  strong  all over  again  and  again , but  sometimes when we fall  it doesn't  mean  we  get stronger  ,   but  sometimes  it  opens  old wounds  that  healed  over time , wounds  that  remind  you  how  hurtful  it is  to  be  betrayed and  be stabbed  in the  back.

LOVE can  make  you  feel great !

Makes you  happy  and  seems  like  that  there's no  ending  to  it  but reality  is  ,  LOVE also  hurts  , and  yeah  it  hurts  bad! 

TEARS

  There are people that  makes a tremendous impact  in our  LIVES

  Some will make us feel the greatest  feeling of 
  JOY & HAPPINESS ....

  and

 Some will HURT you

 that  the PAIN you  feel

               is like a butcher's knife, cutting DEEPLY  to  the bones ...

                                            

  and

LEAVING  you  BLEEDING & DYING inside ....